Dog Says "F It, Chocolate Is Delicious"
NEW YORK - Neighborhood dog, Sauron, finally gave into temptation and ate chocolate, knowing it’s basically poison for him, sources confirm.
“I watched him watch that piece of chocolate for what felt like an eternity,” commented bystander Sara, a neighborhood cat. “I saw his eyes get so wide, and then, that was it, chomp!”
Though most assume he would regret his actions, Sauron has confirmed it was worth it.
“I regret nothing,” he repeated over and over again while curled in a ball in the corner of a dark room. “And I’ll do it again!”
Though owners Beth and Ali Parson were initially upset that Sauron took their treats, they decided the ensuing belly ache was punishment enough.
“He’s about to have a real unpleasant couple of days, so, he’ll learn his lesson.”
Article by Louie Aronowitz - @louiearonowitz