Dog Understands English, Chooses to Ignore Owner

Dog Understands English, Chooses to Ignore Owner

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LOS ANGELES - Claude, a Labrador puppy, uniformly comprehends the English language, and simply opts to neglect his owner’s incessant commands, sources allege.

“Yeah, I get every word,” Claude commented. “I just love to see how red his face gets when he tells me to ‘sit’ and instead I jump up on the sofa I’m not allowed on and eat the food I’m not supposed to have.”

Claude’s owner, Arnold Fleming, blames the issues on the language barrier, completely unaware his pet fully understands every word he speaks.

“I wish there was a duolingo for dogs,” Fleming began. “You know, like some sort of doggolingo. Maybe BabelDog? Can I copyright that right now?”

Claude was less than impressed with the idea.

“Doggolingo? Babeldog? Trying to copyright this nonsense?” Claude asked, stunned. “Geez. And this nerd still wonders why I reject his every command. Dude, listen to yourself!”


Article by Tucker Hutchinson - @tuckhutch77

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