Stranger Refusing To Pet Dog
NEW YORK - Dwayne “The Dog” Johnson, a neighborhood beagle, has confirmed the human he approached at a Manhattan restaurant has outright refused to pet him.
“It makes literally no sense at all,” Johnson began. “I ran over, jumped up on him, started licking him, and he just turned away and ignored me. What is his problem?!”
Johnson’s owner, Pete Crimmons, expressed embarrassment over the entire situation.
“I felt awful,” Crimmons commented. “Dwayne The Dog Johnson is very friendly, and for some reason this monster just wanted to sit there eating his dinner and chatting with his date. What is wrong with people?!”
The bystander in question acknowledged how cute Johnson is, just moments before also acknowledging they are in a five-star steakhouse, not a dog park.
“Not only did he refuse to pet me,” Johnson continued. “But he turned to Pete and said something about a sign at the entrance banning pets in this place. What is his problem? What a weirdo!”
Article by Louie Aronowitz - @louiearonowitz