Hero Dog Saves Woman From Brushing Crumbs Off Shirt
LAS VEGAS - A local dog named Daisy is being heralded as a hero after saving her owner the trouble of brushing several potato chip crumbs off of her own sweater late yesterday evening, a source confirms.
“It all happened so fast,” recalled Daisy’s owner, Sarah Park. “I was like, six episodes in on a pretty heavy Spaced bender when all of a sudden I look down and see chips just fucking everywhere, man. Like, all over the place.”
Before Park could be bothered to lift her hand out of the “party size” bag of Lay’s she was enjoying, to brush the mess away, Daisy sprung into action.
“She just jumped up on the couch and got to work, like her instincts must have just told her what to do or something,” Park stated. “I’ve never seen anything like it; she basically acted like a vacuum, except super cute; one of those cute vacuums. I didn’t even have to stop eating.”
While the ordeal left Park bewildered, saving her owner from taking the time to address minor inconveniences is nothing new for Daisy.
“Sarah’s always spilling, and dropping, and just generally breaking stuff, so I try to help out when I can,” Daisy said. “I usually just end up with crumbs, but one time I found an ice cream sandwich wrapper with some of that chocolate stuff stuck to it. That was basically the best day ever, even though I got a nasty belly ache that night for some totally unrelated other reason probably.”
Daisy was later heard lapping up soda from the generic-brand two-liter of cola Sarah spilled while reaching for “Lupita Nbong’o”.
Krissy Howard - @peoplefoood
Photo by Alan Chiu