Dog Celebrates New Year’s Eve Seven Times
NEW YORK - Rush, a neighborhood beagle, has confirmed plans for all seven new years coming up.
“Seven years older, seven years wiser,” Rush mused. “I feel I’ve earned my seven New Year celebrations. I was really productive these years. Passed 14 semesters of school, completed all 70 resolutions from last year, and made 70 brand new ones for my next seven years.”
Rush’s owner has implied agreement, setting aside seven treats for midnight on the big day.
“I got one of those giant giant milk bones at the airport,” Rosa Martin commented. “And then of course seven glasses of sparkling water for midnight. This is a big one too, he’s turning 21 these years.”
While Rush was excited for the celebrations, he expressed anxiety over seven midnight kisses.
“I haven’t even begun thinking about who I want to kiss at midnight,” he shyly admitted. “It feels presumptuous to plan it out, but at the same time, it’s a thing. Everyone will be doing it, I don’t want to be left out. I better hit the streets this week and line up some candidates.”
Rush also confirmed, due to unfortunate events, these past years didn’t even feel like just seven years, they felt more like 140.